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Tuesday, October 1, 2013

Jester

Ares tossed and turned in his bed in Ravenclaw Tower unable to find sleep.  He was anxious to get started on making the Elixir of Life so he could become immortal.  Horcruxes were too easily destroyed if one had basilisk venom and Ares knew when a horcrux died the human would feel part of their selves die as well.  The human would become mad with the desperation to preserve what bit of soul they had left. 
Unable to sleep Ares got up and went down to the common room.  The fire had long died out but Ares stared into the fireplace lost in thought as he began thinking about what Salazar had said about dark lords being unhappy.  He knew that his father missed Raven and knew a bit about Grindelwald.  Grindelwald who was locked up in Nurmengard, a wizard prison near Germany.  Ares chuckled at that.  Grindelwald had been defeated by his lover and locked up there instead of killed.  “Wouldn’t that be the scandal of the century?” Ares asked as his body shook with silent laughter at the thought of ‘slipping’ to the Daily Prophet that their famous leader was gay, killed his sister, and was Voldemort’s father.  “Yes any of that information would ruin the man’s career as headmaster at least.  But the wizarding world are such sheep that they would probably AK themselves if Dumbledore told them to. Idiots.”
Yawning Ares made his way back upstairs and fell asleep.  He had seen the new DADA professor; a man named Gildeory Lockhart yesterday at the Welcoming Back Feast and thought the man was full of himself. “Must we always have incompetent fools for teachers for DADA?  I know father cursed the position but honestly! That’s no reason for Dumbledore to bring in idiots who can’t even teach at all.”
The next morning Ares was up and staring in disgust at the staff table in the Great Hall at breakfast.  “That man deserves to die,” Ares said quietly to his claws that were sitting around him.  “He’s more likely to stare at his reflection in the mirror than be a competent teacher.”
The claws near Ares snickered at their master’s statement about the pompous idiot who was seated between Flitwick and McGonagall. “No Hermione.  You should learn that some people can’t be trusted and just because he proclaims to be ‘famous’ doesn’t mean he is. For all we know he could be using memory charms and taking credit for what others have done.”
DADA class finally arrived and the ravens were standing in front of the classroom door.  They went in and took their seats.  Around the classroom were pictures of Lockhart.  Ares rolled his eyes at the tacky décor.  The man was in love with himself.  Strike one as far as Ares was concerned.  He just knew he wasn’t going to like this year.
The door that led to the office and quarters of the DADA professor opened and Lockhart stepped out and stood there smiling at everybody.  Most of the girls in the class, including Hermione and Indigo, were swooning over the man before them.  Ares snorted in disgust and pulled out the books he had purchased that weren’t all written by the fool standing before him.  Tapping his fingers on the desk Ares waited for the man to do something. 
Lockhart finally walked down the stairs and stopped in front of the class.  “Can you all hear me?  Can you all see me? Good!  My name is Gilderoy Lockhart.  Order of Merlin Third Class, Honorary member of the Defense Against the Dark Arts League and five time winner of Witch Weekly’s Most Charming Smile Award.  I am your new DADA professor.  First we are going to have a pop quiz.  It’s just to show me what you have learned.” 
Ares looked down at his pop quiz and had to resist raising his wand to curse the professor before him.  Every question was about the stupid professor!  Ares waved his wand and vanished the test.  He shook his head as he looked around the room and saw that everyone else was still working on it.  “Time’s up,” Lockhart said after half an hour.  He collected all the quizzes and began grading them.  Lockhart began to grade the papers while the students just sat there.  “Today I am also going to introduce you to a terrifying magical creature.  Do not laugh or make a sound for it may provoke them.”
With a flourish the sheet was thrown off the cage to reveal Cornish Pixies.  Lockhart flung open the cage door and the little buggers flew out of the cage and began wreaking havoc.  One of the pixies grabbed Lockhart’s wand and threw it out the window. Neville Longbottom was taken and hoisted up onto the chandelier that hung from the ceiling and the rest of the pixies began pelting the students and tearing apart their textbooks.  “I’ll ask you to take care of them,” Lockhart said as he ran into his office and shut the door with the test papers still in his hands. 
“This is ridiculous,” Ares muttered as he stood up and withdrew his wand.  “Incendio Wavo!”  Ares said as he set fire to the pixies and waved his wand through the air so that all of them were killed.  Then he pointed his wand at Neville.  “Wingardium Leviosa,” Ares said and gently lowered Neville to the ground.  Before Neville could say thanks Ares gathered up his stuff and walked out of the classroom leaving the rest of his classmates in shock at the fact that he had just destroyed a cage full of Cornish Pixies.  “Sheep the entire lot of them,” Ares said as he made his way back to Ravenclaw Tower.
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New Spell: Incideno Wavo-wave of fire

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